Have you ever wandered into a place, a shop, a restaurant, a home, a church or an office and felt your sinuses plug up, your eyes water, your head instantly pound and your throat constrict?
Me too. (No, not that me too -#metoo). I find myself developing allergies never before knownst to these nostrils. It’s a crying shame – literally.
Some of the most wonderful elderly ladies in my church bring tears to my eyes when they get close enough, because their fragrance overpowers my nose, followed by my eyes. And what is one to say? “Get away, out, out, out!” That would be rather rude, and my parents raised me better than that, I’m happy to say. So I subtly back away – way away – and sit somewhere else where I cannot be assaulted by the sweet aroma that is them.
Strong chemicals have the same effect. If you’ve every walked into a hotel room too soon after the housekeepers have done their job and been hit with a tsunami wave of concentrated bleach that makes you feel like you’ve just taken a dip in the City swimming pool, you’ll know what I mean.
Here at the Little English Guesthouse we try our very best not to annoy your nostrils, or your eyeballs, when you walk in the door.
We don’t have plug in scented anything. We don’t fire up Incense sticks. We don’t have spray machines mounted high on the wall to puff out toxic, flower smelling, fumes. If you order romantic roses from us, we lovingly arrange them and place them in your room before your arrival, and close the door to said room. It is rather an odd thing that store-bought flowers frequently emanate no smell whatsoever nowadays, but that’s for another topic…
We air out rooms by opening the windows, wash the linens in unscented detergent, use no fabric softener and hang them on the line to dry in 100% Florida sunshine. Guests often ask us what kind of dryer sheets or fabric softener we use because the sheets smell so fresh. We love telling them that we only use 100% fresh air! As well as being environmentally friendly, it’s a particularly speedy way to dry fabrics when it’s 100 degrees outside! In the winter, when it’s Florida cold, it’s actually still quite warm. Linens still get dry, just take a tad bit longer. What’s not to love about that?
Everything is cleaned and sanitized. And it’s all aired out before guests arrive. Because our goal is to smell like ….. nothing.
We can’t always guarantee it, after all there are some people that like to throw on the cologne and remind you of their presence long after they’ve gone. Nevertheless, the smell of nothing is our goal, and most days, we’re spot on. Some folks might find that a wee bit bland – dull, even. Those folks have perhaps never found themselves gagging and unable to breathe because of an unseen, allergy-producing, essence-of-something in the air.
So if you’re looking for a place that’s clean, safe and smells like not very much at all – we think you might like it here! Our regulars, who keep coming to stay with us over the last 19 years, frequently cite this as just one of the reasons. Come and see! Book now
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